Sex FailsCONDUCTED BY LELANDRA RANDLE
When things don't go quite as planned...
"One time I was having sex after a long day of basketball training and caught an excruciating cramp in my right hamstring. I tried to keep going but I couldn't breathe. I thought of my options: keep going and push through or embarrassingly stop and lie down next to the girl. Instead I stopped pulled out my muscle roller and used it nude to relieve my hamstring. I got over the cramp, finished, and was right with the world."
-Anonymous "I couldn't breathe." "While I was giving a blowjob to a guy he goes "you actually give better head than both the girls who gave me head earlier tonight" -Anonymous My boyfriend and I were having car sex when he left the lights on and the battery died, so we ordered pizza while we waited for AAA to come restart his car." -Anonymous "One time I was having sex and we couldn’t find lube. We were desperate, so we decided to use soap. It burned badly." -Anonymous "We decided to use soap." "While very drunk on my birthday I fell asleep while my girlfriend was giving me head." -Anonymous "The first time I hooked up with someone, I snuck out of my house at 2 AM and drove 30 minutes away to this guy's house. He told me about how their family had this complex security system, because apparently some woman broke into his house once. Anyways, we got to it. I hated every second of it, and I didn't even finish (after over an hour), and to top things off, the alarm suddenly started blaring throughout his house and I thought we were going to die. I felt like I was in The Purge. At least I lived to tell the story." -Anonymous "I thought we were going to die." "I was really iffy about whether or not I wanted to have sex with my hookup, so he asked me to cuddle instead. After a couple of minutes of talking and cuddling, I decided that I was into it. I told him I’d be right back and ran to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth (typical I know), and then rushed back in. Expecting to see him eager and waiting impatiently in bed, I was surprised to the hear the extremely LOUD snores bellowing from his nose and wide-open mouth. We did not have sex that night." -Anonymous "LOUD snores bellowing from his nose." Interested in having your sex fail (or success!) published in our next edition of XMag? Submit your story to [email protected]. Note: Quotes minimally edited for clarity. |